Friday, June 6, 2014
Coaches & Critics
Lately, I have been questioning my own worth. This stems from lots of criticism within my work, leading to me questioning my value outside of the workplace. It should be noted that I do believe that our value comes from God and that is much greater than any of us can imagine. However, when we are consistently made to feel bad about ourselves and told that we are just tools and not respected as individuals, then it begins to wear on you. I am a perfectionist and I am my biggest critic; however, this does not make it okay for others to belittle me and use their "authority" to make me feel weak.
Why am I writing about critics? Well, I know that I am not the only one that comes in contact with critics on a daily basis and I am not the only one that is emotionally broken because of them. I encourage everyone that has strong critics in their lives to begin thinking about who their coaches are. Coaches are people in your life that care about you. They can give you constructive criticism, but encourage you to see your worth within these areas. They push you to pursue your dreams and, often, point out your strengths, even when you seem to be blind to them.
I have quite a few coaches in my life and they really do outweigh the critics. My coaches are not as loud and consistent as my critics, but they are always there when I need them to be. When I was in college and grad school, my coaches were surrounding me and encouraging me to push through the tough times and to pursue my passions. Now, that I am outside of my educational bubble, my critics seem to have more access to me than my coaches do, but that does not mean that I should fall into a slump because of what they say and do to me. My coaches have established a solid foundation for me and have left lasting impressions on me. Their words of encouragement and their eagerness to mentor, teach, and care for me is far more important than the belittlement I face everyday. I am stronger than my circumstances, because the people that have built me up have done so in a way that has pushed me to follow my own moral compass, to believe in my dreams, and to find value in myself.
I have a decent amount of experiences that have led me to where I am and when those experiences are not acknowledged, I have to take a deep breath and remember that I am not here to impress anyone; I am not here to fulfill their obligations; I am not here in order to make them feel better about themselves; I am here because this is where God has me for the time being and I am to be a faithful servant to him. When I feel like my views and insights are not being heard, I need to realize the loss is not on me, but on the others that refuse to listen. We are all in this place together for a reason and that is not an apparent reason, but, in time, maybe I will find the reason. If I don't, then this situation has only made me stronger.
Thank you to the coaches in my life and thank you to my critics for making me realize how important and priceless my coaches really are.